Parents tell me “Education is about jobs, not happiness”. They want their little Freddie or Nancy to learn how to work for the Man so they can bring home the lettuce. Well, I don’t believe in working for the Man–I believe in working for yourself, and even if you don’t make any money because your ideas are stupid or because you are too far ahead of your time, you know how to be happy. That’s what I teach: how to be happy with yourself, even if you are a complete failure. Anybody can get a job: There’s a retarded guy who serves me ice-cream down at the Big Spoon and I tell my students: “If a retarded guy can get a job so can you!” But can you really be happy being that retarded guy scooping yogurt for the rest of your life? For that you need Shakespeare and Homer. And that is why w read literature! Of course if you are retarded you might want to get the Sparknotes.